Owning it and help from a friend

It’s been a wild few months since I won the 2020 Goldie for my erotic novel,  Double Six. The award still doesn’t have a permanent home in my house. It is in its lovely box on my shelf because I moved my office at the start of the pandemic. I have a desk now in the corner of my living room and am back to writing where ever I can find space to sit with my laptop.

This photo makes me nostalgic for the time when I could drop the kids off at school and head to my favorite tea shop, have an oaty biscuit and a pot of tea and lose myself in my imaginary world. Both the tea shop and my ability to physically remove myself from my home to write are gone. But the ability to lose myself in my imaginary world remains.

But it feels a little different now. The Goldie award lurks in the of my periphery of thoughts. I worry if my next book will be as well received. If I think about it too much, I can find myself paralyzed. I’m super fortunate to have a very good friend who, when I mentioned this imposter feeling and struggle I was having offered this advice. First, she reminded me of things I tend to forget, for instance, this is not my first book, that folks wanted to read my stories. And she said the words I needed to hear:

“Get on with it. Write your damn book.”

It is the perfect reminder of what makes the difference between committing yourself to write a book.  I’ve written them on a card and stuck them where I can see them whenever I find myself distracted or worried or being precious about my writing. If you are creative and stuck or if your struggling with imposter syndrome, I’m offering you the same tough love.

“Get on with it. Write your damn book.”

Thank you,  VT, and I think we need to make this a t-shirt and maybe a mug 🙂 

 

Brenda Murphy writes short fiction and novels. Her novel Double Six won the 2020 GCLS Goldie for Erotica. She loves tattoos and sideshows and yes, those are her monkeys.  When she is not loitering on her front porch and writing, she wrangles two kids, one dog, and an unrepentant parrot.  She blogs about life as a writer with ADHD and publishes photographs on her blog Writing While Distracted.  Sign Up for her email list and receive a free erotic short story at   www.brendalmurphy.com

Books available at

Amazon 

NineStar Press

On The Square

Double Six

Complex Dimensions

Knotted Legacy

Both Ends of the Whip

ONE  

Sum of the Whole 

Dominique and Other Stories 

 

The Point

 

On the Square, the first book in the University Square series will release August 17th. And because I deal with anxiety over new releases by working, I started writing a new novel this week, the third in my University Square series. We also started homeschooling this week. And did I mention I started working on stripping the wallpaper in my daughter’s room so I can paint it? Because that’s how I roll.
The blessing and curse of ADHD is  I’m not able to sit still for long. Unless its something I hyperfocused on, then you could blow the house up around me, and I wouldn’t notice.
What is my point? Finding a balance is impossible for me. I am either working at top speed or sleeping. It makes me productive but also frustrated with myself at times. My busy-bee brain refuses to be still.

I’ve learned to work with it instead of fighting it, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be able to sit and watch the flowers grow. The last few months have been some of the most difficult in my life. I’ve spent much of my time distracting myself with books and movies. I’ve also filled several pages of my planning notebook with ideas for stories I want to write someday.
With the state of the world right now, it sometimes feels pointless plan anything, much less to spend time in make-believe worlds with my imaginary friends. But then a reader will message me asking when my next book will be published, and I remember the point after all.
I write to provide a bit of respite from the world and distract readers from real life, and that is reason enough to keep writing.

Brenda Murphy writes short fiction and novels. Her novel Double Six won the 2020 GCLS Goldie for Erotica. She loves tattoos and sideshows and yes, those are her monkeys.  When she is not loitering on her front porch and writing, she wrangles two kids, one dog, and an unrepentant parrot.  She blogs about life as a writer with ADHD and publishes photographs on her blog Writing While Distracted.  Sign Up for her email list and receive a free erotic short story at   www.brendalmurphy.com

Books available at

Amazon 

NineStar Press

Double Six

Complex Dimensions

Knotted Legacy

Both Ends of the Whip

ONE  

Sum of the Whole 

Dominique and Other Stories