Monthly Archives: May 2014

Powerful and Evocative: Octavia Butler

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Give me the thorns…

It was 1981 when I discovered Octavia Butler’s fiction.  I fell hard, reading everything that I could find that she had written.  As an long time fan of Science Fiction/Fantasy, I craved stories that featured women as more than objectified window dressing. Octavia Butler’s writing is populated with women who are intelligent, strong, survivors, and creators.   Her writing is evocative and powerful. Crisp and clear, her pacing forces you to read on, long after you should have turned off the light.

Octavia Butler was not afraid to write about pain, death, rape, slavery, the future, sexual violence, power dynamics, and racism. The difficult topics that so many writers look away from, or gloss over in their work, she featured front and center in her stories.  Her writing pulls you close, and forces you to keep reading, even when part of you wants to look away. Her language is intoxicating. Her voice draws you into her world, and everything else falls away. Be warned: Ms. Butler will make you think about things you might not want to think about.

My favorite books/stories are:

1. Blood Child- (Blood Child and other Stories, 1995)  Insects, male pregnancy, power dynamics and love.  This story won both the HUGO and the Nebula award. It was the first of her works I read, and the one I go back to when I need a fix.

2. Fledgling (2005) Vampires, Race, and Society.  A welcome twist on the vampire motif. No sparkly vampires here!

3. Kindred (1979) Nightmare fantasy, time travel, and slavery. Read it at least twice to get the full effect. Her ability to weave past and present events is exceptional.

4. Lilith’s Brood ( Xenogenisis Trilogy- published as omnibus editions since 2000) – Genetics, third gender extraterrestrials, sex and power dynamics.  Lover or master? Rescued or captured? Or all of the above? This collection of stories is seductive and terrifying.

5. Parable of the Sower (1993) Dystopian future, Race,  the power of learning, a new religion, and hope.  This novel reminds me that there is always a way forward for those that strive to make their own way.

What I have learned as a writer reading Octavia Butler:
1. Don’t be afraid of exploring and writing the hard stuff: Race, gender dynamics, sexual violence, power dynamics, hate, and love.
2. Wrapping difficult topics in a captivating story makes them provocative and powerful.
3. Story construction and pacing is as important as word choice.

Octavia Butler left us in 2006. I still grieve for the stories she had inside that we didn’t get to read.

You Have to Crawl before You Run: Tarts and the Craft of Writing

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Ohau 2011
So what the heck to tarts, a crawling baby, and writing have to do with each other? You fall a lot, you try different things, sometimes you cry, eventually you stand up and take your first steps, then you run.  
Asparagus and Mushroom Tart
I love to cook. I love trying to master new recipes and different cooking techniques. This is a picture of my first tart. I didn’t own a tart pan, and had to make do with what I had. It tasted okay, but the crust was wrong. This tart asparagus and mushroom tart was dense and tasteless, with too much cream, and too much sharp cheddar. I know that learning to make a good tart is going to take time, practice and analysis of what works, and what does not.  
Walking,  making a good tart, and writing a good story, take practice, experimentation, and time. 
The way to become proficient at walking is to keep standing up and taking steps, the way to become a good cook is to keep cooking, and the way to becoming a good writer is to keep writing. 
I did not become a good cook over night. I started cooking when I was fourteen. Over the last forty years I have studied, taken cooking classes, watched cooking shows, experimented, and kept cooking. I have had my share of kitchen disasters, but I never stopped cooking. 
 Leaning to write is like learning to walk, and learning to cook. You just have to keep practicing.
 Take your time.  Write everyday. Write for yourself. Try different things. Practice. Submit a manuscript. Deal with rejection. Keep writing.  

All the things I did when I was supposed to be writing my blog post

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Maui 2009

I started out strong, tucked into my in my favorite coffee shop words flowing, but then two loud talkers came in and started talking about their lives. So I packed up and went to my office to write, forgetting that the reason I was in the coffee shop is because my office is a complete wreck with post-conference materials, general debris, and change of season clothes bins.
So I:
1. Started cleaning up my office, stepped on my favorite hot pink clipboard, broke it. Did not finish office cleaning.
2. Looked online for professional office cleaning services that could help me out next time so I don’t end up breaking more stuff.
3. Looked through all my office supplies for a suitable replacement. Yes, I have an office supply addiction, don’t you?
4. Stopped off at the library on my way to get new clipboard, picked up books on hold, signed kids up for summer storytime, chatted with the librarian.
5. Went to office supply store to get clipboard, remembered I needed toner, found toner, spent time wandering around looking for a new clipboard, ogling office supplies, and fondling pens. Loitered talking with my favorite store clerk. Yes, she knows my name, and that I sometimes refer to her as my dealer. I told you, I have an addiction.
6. Remember that we are out of bread. Go by grocery store to get bread, run into friend, talk about Summer plans, pick up potato chips, get in line to buy chips, have to leave line to get bread that I went in for.
7. Get to school early for pick up, and write this in the while waiting in the car. Make notes and deepen outline for the post I did not write.

So it goes. I realized that my difficultly writing this week’s post is that I have not done enough thinking about the topic I wanted to write about. I often find myself procrastinating/ self-interrupting when I have not spent enough time noodling/researching my topic.
The take away is this: when a piece you are working on doesn’t work, it is okay put it aside and give yourself time to think about what your want to write. This is not the same as abandoning a project, although sometimes that is the wisest thing to do.

Figuring out when to quit, when to let something rest, and when to press on is part of understanding yourself. For those of us with attention issues, this is particularly difficult as we often have exciting ideas about other projects that would be so much more fun/exciting/better than what we are doing at the moment.

When the urge hits to abandon a project I ask myself these five questions.

  1. Will it make a difference in my life if I quit?
  2. Do I need information/ resources/ help to complete this project?
  3. Is there a way to change the project so that I will want to do it?
  4. Will quitting cause a problem for important people in my life?
  5. What would make me want to finish the project?
The answers to these questions help me determine if my procrastination is really just thinking in disguise. When the urge to quit hits, try asking yourself these questions and give yourself permission to creatively procrastinate.

Tips for Listening or “I swear we never talked about that!”

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They are all ears!

Improving your listening skills may not be easy, but it should be a priority. Listening is the key to good relationships, following directions, understanding others, and success. It is a difficult task for those of us with ADD/ADHD.  Our minds pick up words randomly and start new lines of thoughts in our heads, while you are still talking to us. Our brains haphazardly latch on to phrases, we notice your sparkly jewelry, someone walks by, and we struggle to focus on what you are saying to us. If we are the middle of another task, and you talk to us, we will respond.  You will leave thinking we heard you, and we will be left wondering what it was you said to us.

Unlike people who struggle to listen because they are thinking of their response,  ADD/ADHD folks are trying to sort unimportant information from important information.  We are trying to reel in our brains that have gone on off on some tangent, provoked by a word, or phrase in the conversation.

Given our impulse control issues, this leads to us blurting out some truly off the wall comments in the middle of conversations.  This can cause people to  think that we are:  A) crazy,  B) rude, or C) all of the above.  Developing listening skills takes work.

If you struggle with listening try these three tips:

1) Speak up if you are having a hard time concentrating. This means admitting to people that you have no idea what they just said. Ask to move the conversation to a less distraction filled location.

2) Stop. If you are doing another activity, and it is safe for your to stop that activity, do it. Trying to listen while doing anything else is a sure way to fail.

3) Turn off, or put away electronic devices. Turn off the TV, stick your phone in your pocket, close your laptop, put down the game console, etc.  Screens are death to listening.

As hard as it is to listen in relationships and intimate settings, listening during lectures, and in classroom settings is more problematic. We are surround by other people, and not in control of the environment. An open window, a windy day, anything, and nothing can distract us from the listening. When we  are able to listen, our brains gobble up all material presented, often in no particular order.

 To improve your listening skills in lectures and classroom settings try these three tips:

  1) Take notes. If you do not have a system for taking notes, or if you have a young person who is struggling with how to listen and take notes, this is a  great link to PDF of how to use the Cornell Note taking system .   Over the years I have modified the Cornell System  to work with my visual style of learning.  In addition to using the Cornell system, I add flow charts and use sketches to define key words.

2) Limit distractions in your environment. Choose a seat that distances you from distractions. Sit in the front of the room,  try to sit with your back to windows,  and avoid sitting next to anyone using their computer to take notes.

3) It you feel yourself drifting, get up and stand at the back of the room. It may make it harder to take notes, but standing can help you focus. If you have hyperactivity issues, a fidget, aka a small item you can manipulate, can help improve your focus.  This article explains fidgets for ADHD (http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/8706.html) .  I have used fidgets for years, and find it useful to keep my hands busy in order to sit still.   Fidgets like this can be a big help for adults,  for kids there are fidgets like these  .  If you want to send your child to school with a fidget, make sure to check with the teacher first, find a fidget that is quiet, to avoid distracting to other children.

I hope these tips help. For more information on how to improve your listening skills, I recommend  The Lost Art of Listening: How Learning to Listen Can Improve Your Relationships by Michael P. Nichols, PhD .  My copy is highlighted and underlined.  Although the book is does not specifically address ADD/ADHD issues and listening, it made a very big difference in my life.  Improve your listening skills.  The people in your life will thank you for doing it.

The bird is listening…

ADHD and Conferences- My Top Ten Survival Tips

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Stocking Stuffers for certain friends. You know who you are.

I spent last weekend attending Chicago North- RWA’s Spring Fling 2014.  If you are a fiction writer and ever consider going to a conference, I highly recommend that you mark your calendar for the 2016 conference. The conference was well organized, information packed, and fun.  I saw old friends, made new friends, and won a basket raffle.

Beth Kery Books and Bath Basket. Beth Kery and her books rock!

 I came home energized, and in possession of new information and ideas that I will be able to incorporate into my writing and my career.  This conference is outstanding for the way it strikes a balance between business of writing sessions, and craft of writing sessions.  As a writer it is so wonderful to be with people who understand the drive and desire to write. They understand your need to write stories about your imaginary friends.  I had the opportunity to meet and interact with successful multi-published authors who could not have been more open, friendly, helpful, and inspiring.

Attending conferences as an individual with ADHD can be overwhelming, like locked in a Christmas Shop kind of overwhelming.  Several factors contribute to this:

1) Adrenalin. A new place with new people, unfamiliar surroundings, and many new things to look
at / do / interact with.

2) Information overload. Attending sessions packed full of information can make your head feel like it is about to explode ala Scanners. ( If you have never seen Scanners, I only recommend it for the exploding heads.)

3) People overload. It can be overwhelming to meet new people.  Trying to pay attention/ sort out/ keep track of new faces and names can make your already over-full brain, shut down and refuse to process any more new information. This is why you meet someone, and when you run into them an hour later at a different session you can not remember their name. This is the time to take advantage of the name tags everyone wears!

As a professional I have attended many conferences. Many times I would come home exhausted and frustrated rather than full and energized. My frustration would stem from knowing I had the opportunity to learn valuable information, and the potential to meet really great people, but having been overwhelmed, my brain would shut down. I would come home with a bunch of scribbled notes, and the feeling I had missed something.  Over the years, I have developed a set of strategies that help me enjoy and get the most out of a conference.

Top Ten Tips for Thriving in a Conference Environment.

1) Don’t forget to eat. It is so easy to get caught up  in everything that you forget to eat. Your brain and your body need food.  Make good food choices. It is fine to have some fun eating away from home but do not go crazy eating nothing but sweet sugary treats and drinking your caffeinated beverage of choice. No matter how fun it is. This goes for visits to the bar too.

Pace yourself!

2) Hydrate! Your brain is made up of water, a minor level of dehydration impairs brain function, sugary drinks, sweets, and alcohol all work to dehydrate your brain.

3) Sit up front in panels and presentations. Not having a lot of people around you is less distracting. Take notes, or doodle if the information is preprinted.  Giving your hands something to do will help you retain the information presented.

4) If you take electronic notes I recommend using the Evernote app.  I discuss using the Evernote app in this post (My Brain is Full Post ).   Evernote provides me with something I have never had before, legible, organized notes. It is so easy to let conference notes in a half filled notebook languish in some bottom drawer.  Evernote is an easy way to ensure that your notes are organized, and useful.

5) Plan your day with alternatives.  If you get to a session that is too full, have a back up session or activity planned. I have issues with small spaces and too many people,  so I always have a back up plan.

6) Plan for breaks to walk outside and get some fresh air.  It doesn’t have to be long, but it helps to clear your head and wake up your brain. Being in nature also gives your adrenals a rest.

7) Expect to not sleep.  The combination of a new place, seeing people you only get to see at conferences, and adrenalin surges from the Christmas shop effect will hamper your sleep. Do the best you can. Plan a power nap if you know you are going to be at a late session.

8) Try to take a mental break before bed.  No screens (computer, phone, TV) for at least one hour before bed.

9) Make it a goal to stretch yourself. Meet new people. Try to make at least one new acquaintance.

10) Have fun!  
My wonderful in-laws came to help with the kids while I was gone.

                   
These are just gratuitous pictures of my adorable kids.